Monday, June 15, 2009

Trial and Error

Yesterday, a few of us friends met after quite some time. It was really very invigorating, to roam on the T-Nagar streets aimlessly, to gen-enthu crash into Naidu Hall for water and AC there, generally sit in there gossiping and pretending to be looking at the skirt collection, make a friend try out utterly ridiculous clothes in the trial room and take snaps, sit on the iron bench on the platform licking softie and cracking jokes about strangers and their clothes n all, remembering and quoting funny n stupid nostalgic incidents. I realized that my life had come to a total standstill, a huge mundane meaningless void.

I waited for a really long time in the terminus for my bus thinking all of this. I felt really mad at myself for having landed there, where I was, and told myself that I was the only one who could save myself from sinking further into the emptiness, and I simply HAD to spice up my life, at least a little bit for the starters. There were other buses coming in and going out, with school/college punks making a huge racket and climbing on the running buses. There it was right in front of my eyes, something I could do, or atleast try. I was as good as any guy, not too fat, not too old, and not too stiff either. So, I finally found a bus to get on, and decided to wait till the bus started and get on after that! Afterall, I was alone; no parents/sis/friends with me, who would tense/freak/snigger at my attempt. Even if I embarrassed myself, I would be only in front of total strangers who I might never see, like ever again! So… I did it! I mean, tried getting on the running bus.

First attempt: total failure. The first step of the bus seemed to be too high for my legs to reach and the hold was slipping. People had spotted what I was trying. Some loki perverts were cheering, while some adults were keeping a what-the-hell-is-she-thinking face.

But then, I heard my own voice in my head. “ What the hell female?!? How difficult is this? If you are going to fail at this, then you clearly deserve to be in the boring mundane void space for the rest of your life and definitely deserve to be in called ‘anty’ by tat one-year-old-neighbor-kid.” That was it.

Second attempt: SUCCESS!! Ruling out the wild appreciating cheers by some and highly disapproving frowns by others and the throbbing pain in my arms and nicely hit legs & toes, I completely succeed in getting into tat running bus!! :D Now this was something I had never dared to risk or never been allowed to do by the accompanying person. There! My life was not as mundane as I thought afterall!!

I came home, smiling widely, much to the pleasure of my parents. But I become conscious of the blunder and the painful after-effects of my ‘enthued experimentation’ only today, and got appalling feedbacks from various parts of my body. Every time I walk, my damned head now groans and says, “Awww…. That damned bus!! You knew I was blabbering, having stayed in the scorching sun for a really long time! Why-o-why did you have to listen to me?”

So I have decided 3 things:
1. I might be as good as a guy in most of the stuff, but getting on running busses is definitely NOT one of them.
2. My brain doesn’t die like in stroke when exposed to scorching sun for a really long time; it just tries TO KILL ME!!!
3. No matter how many gimmicks I do, that kiddo next door is going to call me anty nevertheless!! So might as well accept it and never let it come near!! :P

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Difficult Love

Sometimes, just sometimes, love could be torturous. People you love, and mainly those who love you back, often tend to do things you hate and take you for granted to such an extent that you seriously wish you were on the peak of Himalayas wearing an orange dress with a chain of beads in hands, chanting gibberish stuff.

Right when you stomach is upset, they make you eat ‘the-food-they-made-outta-love’ even if you feel nauseous. Right when you have a bitter cold, they offer sweets and serve icecreams or grapes or cucumbers and complain if you don’t eat. Oh, and only when you request them to keep a secret, they gossip about it, claiming to be helping in spreading the word. And when you don’t appreciate being bought a new dress forcefully, you are considered to have an attitude problem; just like they brand you to be too headstrong and obstinate when they are the ones ‘trying to be there for you’ when the main thing you want is some time alone. The worst part is when one is expected to take it all with a wide smile on face, swallowing all the pain and grief of never getting what is wanted dearly, because it never feels great, not being able to control your own life!

Distance, speed, weight, time etc etc have respective global units to quantify. Love, is probably one of the very few attributes, that have no specific units. They are solely quantified based on the method of expression and NOT the amount showered. Being with your loved ones would be the most rewarding feeling if everyone expresses it in the way the other person wants or understands. Else, it equivalent to speaking in an alien language and doesn’t make sense, and after one point, leads to frustration and doubts. Love should be the easiest thing in the world. ,If it becomes extremely difficult and intolerable, then it either means that there is a HUGE communication gap and lack of understanding, or simply that the people are from India!!! It is here that even after 18 or even 21, men and women are still treated as children by adults, and their needs and wants overruled in the name of ‘love’ and ‘care’ of elders who ‘ALWAYS know-better’. Curiosity and joblessness of society and relatives and ‘loved ones’ overrides personal space and privacy. But the most important thing that people don’t realize is that one can retain water only in open and cupped hand. The minute fingers close upon it and try to clench it tightly, the water escapes, and is lost, just like love and respect.

And the sooner people understand this, the better it would be for everyone, else whole bonding might get ripped right from the foundation.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Girl Crushes if I were a Guy

Disclaimer: Male Chauvinist Guys and Anti feminists- Stay away from this post!!!! This post may contain a lot of exaggerated views, and is not meant to offend anyone.

Well, though this is a tag from Vimal/Vimala, Vimmu/Vimmi, I am definitely not entering any sort of a sex-transformation machine for this! As a girl its kind of easy to think from a guy's shoes, mainly coz- guys don’t think at all!! :P
Just kidding! But if I were a guy, then I would have been a Tambram guy! 8O!! Now that’s a disaster!!
Anyways, if I were a sensible tambram guy (again, paradoxical, as far as girls/sex/crushes/love-life is concerned.. I know!) But, Let me be the first of the kind, and think from a 'sensible Indian Tamil Brahmin Guy's' point of view.

Bipasha Basu- A tambram would mostly looove to gawk at such a girl on-screen only. He would blush and look down or look away and pretend that he just did not see her, if encountered with one in real life, and bitch about her attitude and exposure and 'slutty attitude' behind.
Priyanka Chopra-A Tambram would want the girl he has a crush on to be the ultimate hottie, wearing sexy traditional dresses, who is appreciated by all his friends, and who makes him proud even as an acquaintance.

Sania Mirza- a sportswoman, wearing short cute dresses, playing solo in front of raving audience, representing the country, lots of attitude.. Nothing more to say!

Genilia- Now this, I have no idea why! (Could give it to her cute bubbly looks though..) I haven’t come across even one tamil guy, who doesn't have fantasies about her! So if I were a tamil guy, I guess I too would fantasize her, probably because her characters are normally as dumb as a mcp and an antifeminist would like to think of a girl!

and 5th... gosh! I am running out of girls!! :P or may be I am just getting back to a-straight-girl-who-can't-have-girl-crushes girl again.. :D
Well, since I can't think of anyone specific, in general, I think a guy could and would have a crush on a career woman, in a suit, with loads of attitude and capability to knock him down and kick his ass, and yet smiles on his face and greets him with a charm! :P ( thought of this from a girl's shoes only, n not from a guy's perspective).

So, there you go Vimal.. your rescue card from my side!! :)

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

The World Needs a Super Hero!

The racist attacks in Aus on harmless Indian students whose only crime was to farewell in acads and in jobs, while the aussies weren’t as good, and were driven to this point merely by their own insecurities, is just shocking! I mean how lower could they fall? Feelings like these just don’t burst out suddenly! They must have been pent-up for ages! If they thought that Indians were such a competition, then why don’t they just work harder and prove that they are as good! How cheap is it to physically hurt an enemy (as if their feelings towards Indians aren’t obvious!), when he is, infact unarmed. But then I really cant help questioning the Indians either, as to why they still risk walking alone on Aus roads, or even don’t fight back(Oh no! I definitely did not mean the ‘Gandhian way’. See what happened? Even the Aus police are clearly against them.)
May be Indians should start going out in groups, be well armed and hurt the attacking racist mob back, so that they never dare hurt another Indian in their remaining life. I am definitely not suggesting starting a war. But walking away, beaten up by brainless jobless gits for no mistake of theirs is as shameful too, and does infact portray Indians as soft and easy targets as they claim! If we are not as soft and cowardly as they say, then SHOW THEM! If the Aus govt doesn’t see a problem arising at all, if they really are deaf and blind to the obviousness of the situation, then they are playing an active part in the racist movement too. Why don’t they just gather their balls and jus tell the Indians to leave their country alive, and outright?
And here are our dear politicians, walking, talking and thinking in slow motion! Well, obviously, if they take immediate steps, even though people would benefit, they’ll also forget it as fast. The men-in-power want the whole issue to blow up as much as possible so that when they actually do something, they will be able to flaunt it in next elections and gain votes. They are just making news and talking a lot, just like the post-26/11 attacks.
Now that issue is even more ridiculous. Kasab’s trial, his sneering jeering comments and smirks over the accusations, with our dear darling Indian police and military wiping his dribble and washing his poop and feeding him with nutritious diet, when people like him and the masterminds like Hafiz Mohammad Saeed who has actually been acquitted and freed of all charges, don’t deserve a fair/unfair trial at all! All they deserve is to be executed publicly, right on the Rajpath, in front of the India Gate. That would show the terrorists where they stand and what their fate will be if they even so much as set foot on Indian soil with any wrong ideas. But they know just as we do, that Indian politicians are spine-less useless softie-pants who would even bear seeing poor helpless Indians suffer, but never have the heart to give terrorists what they deserve. Even they know how corrupt the post-bearing people are, how corruption starts from the lowest levels and how high all these things run and how Indian politicians are highly predictable and over-ride the military, and can really be taken for-granted. They know that they can get away with anything, without as much as even a scratch on them!
The past few days, have been really horrid, not only in our country. Over 2,000 civilians massacred in Srilanka, even after the war was clearly over, suicide bombs in parts of Somalia and Pak, financial crisis all over the world; Yesterday and today kind of reaching the peak, in all parts of the world. A lot of people have suffered physically and mentally and psychologically. Air France crash taking down around 228 people along with it, their bodies never to be found, about 35 people dead in a bus crash, drowned in Chambal lake, over 400 teenagers taken hostage by the Taliban (who have now been released though, but imagine the plight of parents when their home-returning kinds are in the hands of the mercy-less terrorists!), GM going belly-up leading to a possible unemployment of over thousands, students protesting and suiciding over the smallest of issues like tests and marks.
My mom said that it was high time ‘Kalki’ came to the rescue of humans, or there might not be left any in the future. Kalki is the tenth avatar of Lord Vishnu, who is prophesied to come riding on a horse back, to the rescue of the innocent from the hands of modern-day asuras. Now when they had prophesied this, they might not have thought of predicted the emergence of sophisticated motorized vehicles. But you know what I think? I think ‘Kali’ is simply a super-hero, who could have fallen from a ‘Krypton’ or simply has billions of money and a brave heart to use it against criminals. Kali could emerge from a space-ship or a limousine or a horse-back (as predicted). But right now, the world could really use a Superman!