There was an incident that made my close friends think that I am an extremely sensitive girlie creature, which I most certainly am not. It was even mentioned in my write up while leaving the campus. The incident left me so embarrassed that I never went anywhere near doing it again, until today.
For people who have no idea what I am talking about, there is this sweet romantic movie 'If Only', which I happened to watch in my third year. My roommate was lying fast asleep on the other side of the bed, while I was happily watching it in mine, with my head phones on. The rest of my friends were all sitting in the next room gossipping away.
The movie was no suspense, highly predictable and I could guess where it was going and the ending too, within the first few minutes. I got so engrossed into the panic and desperation of the hero and his romantic ideas and his way of showing how much the his girl meant to him and everything, that by the end, I myself fell in love with him!
With his last monologue I was already in tears; and when she asked "Aren't you coming?" and he replied "Of course I am" knowing what was going to happen, and him covering and protecting her and actually dying for her.. I was weeping by then, uncontrollably!
I hardly realized that my roommate had woken up and was blinking groggily asking what had happened, and even my wingies in had come from the next room inquiring as to why I was crying. When they all saw that I was crying over a dead romantic hero, omg! They burst out laughing so loudly, that it broke my 15 minutes trans and brought me back into the real world.
All this while it has gotten screened a number of times in HBO, in Star Movies n all and I never even turned to that channel. I was that embarrassed! In fact, I have had it in my comp for quite sometime now. So I took a bet against myself, and decided to watch it and check out how mature and realistic I have become.
And to my greatest shock, the final scene this time, left me weeping only for 5 minutes rather then the 15 last time. Sigh! Apparently I am still quite unrealistic! But now, may be I can bet again next time, and end up not crying at all; Or may be never ever attempt watching it again!! :p
Showing posts with label Stupidity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stupidity. Show all posts
Friday, April 23, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
The Beeper
Once again, its been a while since I had time and mood enough to blog. And yet again I am typing away while importing an obscenely huge ugly file into an analytics tool and waiting, waiting and waiting. This waiting seems to have become quite a habit these days, but all the funny incidents that I keep thinking of posting now and then get lost in huge numbers and scripts and other screw-ups.
Yeah! The past 10 days have been an utter screw-up of a lot of things, and then me getting bashed by seniors and managers, first politely and then not-so-politely for my stupid gimmicks. Even at home, parents these days are not as forgiving as they used to be!
Everyone keeps telling me to grow up, though I seriously can’t really relate me growing up as even a remotely possible solution to the existing problems! First of all, why should I grow up?!? And what fun do they all get in making? I live in my own goddamn world and do not intrude into theirs, nor do I try to change their world. Why do people keep trying to invade into mine? Oh well, I guess that’s the definition of ‘Mature Adults’.
Seniors in work keep telling me to take things seriously and attend all meetings and trainings and remind me that I am no more in College and I should learn to be a ‘Professional’ in a ‘Corporate world’.
Parents go a step further… No No.. One step each, and one + one here = three… so three steps further and have taken it as a primary mission in their lives to make me ‘a-marriage-material’ for which I somehow show a shockingly strong resistance, according to them.
Mom that day made me stand in front of the servant maid and her little girl and asked me to identify the different Dals (Kadala paruppu, thuvaram paruppu, ullutham paruppu, etc) and the different types of flour (kadala maavu, maida maavu, arisi maavu etc). The wicked Grandmom and gossipy Servant waited for my answers, which as everyone expected, were totally and completely wrong. I got embarrassed n irritated, Grandmom started laughing and as usual called up the relatives and narrated a hugely exaggerated version and mom was extremely psyched about my ignorance even at something so basic such as ingredients. From that moment, I just resolved openly that I would not set foot into the kitchen even if the rest of the house was on fire, and have been religiously sticking to it since then. The fact that I can cook pretty decently when the ingredients have been identified and given, doesn’t get a lot of credits, it seems.
Grand mom then asked: How are you going to cook for your entire family after you get married?
Me: Family? It would be me and some loser iyengar guy, who would be earning too, I suppose, so we’ll either order from outside or go out and eat! Convenient for both of us!
Beeeeeep. Wrong answers. Yes… Plural.
Grand-mom’s reply to my wrong answer no 1: After marriage, my family would not only be the guy, but his family too.
My response (Sarcastically): Shearr.. just like my current family would become his. So he can come n cook n serve my parents in my place, n I would do the same to his in his place.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. Wrong answer again.
Grand-mom’s reply to my wrong answer no 2: ‘Order from outside or go out and eat’?? Really?? You are really proud that you are earning, aren’t you?
My response (Bewildered): Well, why shouldn’t I? I mean… I am not stealing money or doing anything illegally or immoral, for me to feel ashamed! I have money, so I can spend it the way I want! Now if I buy one pizza, after marriage I’ll probably order two, one for each.I won't mind that.. Honest!! What’s wrong in that?!?!
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppppppp
And the beeper never stopped!!
Well, maybe, just may be, sitting in the office was a tad better than sitting at home with an irritatingly ultrasonic beeper going on every time I open my mouth!!
Good lord.. the import is done earlier than expected! Yeah well, I m sure I’ll get more of such ugly huge files in the near future, and hence more possible blogging time!! :)
Yeah! The past 10 days have been an utter screw-up of a lot of things, and then me getting bashed by seniors and managers, first politely and then not-so-politely for my stupid gimmicks. Even at home, parents these days are not as forgiving as they used to be!
Everyone keeps telling me to grow up, though I seriously can’t really relate me growing up as even a remotely possible solution to the existing problems! First of all, why should I grow up?!? And what fun do they all get in making? I live in my own goddamn world and do not intrude into theirs, nor do I try to change their world. Why do people keep trying to invade into mine? Oh well, I guess that’s the definition of ‘Mature Adults’.
Seniors in work keep telling me to take things seriously and attend all meetings and trainings and remind me that I am no more in College and I should learn to be a ‘Professional’ in a ‘Corporate world’.
Parents go a step further… No No.. One step each, and one + one here = three… so three steps further and have taken it as a primary mission in their lives to make me ‘a-marriage-material’ for which I somehow show a shockingly strong resistance, according to them.
Mom that day made me stand in front of the servant maid and her little girl and asked me to identify the different Dals (Kadala paruppu, thuvaram paruppu, ullutham paruppu, etc) and the different types of flour (kadala maavu, maida maavu, arisi maavu etc). The wicked Grandmom and gossipy Servant waited for my answers, which as everyone expected, were totally and completely wrong. I got embarrassed n irritated, Grandmom started laughing and as usual called up the relatives and narrated a hugely exaggerated version and mom was extremely psyched about my ignorance even at something so basic such as ingredients. From that moment, I just resolved openly that I would not set foot into the kitchen even if the rest of the house was on fire, and have been religiously sticking to it since then. The fact that I can cook pretty decently when the ingredients have been identified and given, doesn’t get a lot of credits, it seems.
Grand mom then asked: How are you going to cook for your entire family after you get married?
Me: Family? It would be me and some loser iyengar guy, who would be earning too, I suppose, so we’ll either order from outside or go out and eat! Convenient for both of us!
Beeeeeep. Wrong answers. Yes… Plural.
Grand-mom’s reply to my wrong answer no 1: After marriage, my family would not only be the guy, but his family too.
My response (Sarcastically): Shearr.. just like my current family would become his. So he can come n cook n serve my parents in my place, n I would do the same to his in his place.
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. Wrong answer again.
Grand-mom’s reply to my wrong answer no 2: ‘Order from outside or go out and eat’?? Really?? You are really proud that you are earning, aren’t you?
My response (Bewildered): Well, why shouldn’t I? I mean… I am not stealing money or doing anything illegally or immoral, for me to feel ashamed! I have money, so I can spend it the way I want! Now if I buy one pizza, after marriage I’ll probably order two, one for each.I won't mind that.. Honest!! What’s wrong in that?!?!
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppppppp
And the beeper never stopped!!
Well, maybe, just may be, sitting in the office was a tad better than sitting at home with an irritatingly ultrasonic beeper going on every time I open my mouth!!
Good lord.. the import is done earlier than expected! Yeah well, I m sure I’ll get more of such ugly huge files in the near future, and hence more possible blogging time!! :)
Friday, September 25, 2009
Who the hell are you?!?
When 2 people meet, there are 3 possibilities:
1. Neither of them know one another, in which case they just walk away without any problems (mostly, I think..)!
2. Both of them know each other and wish/greet/acknowledge their familiarity.
3. One knows the other but the other way.
The third case, I believe, is very common these days, and frequent in my life. At such times when we get to meet or are obliged to make conversation with someone who happens to know us, and yet are strangers to us, what the hell are we supposed to say?
Usually if it’s a relative and I can roughly guess who they are looking at the people around them, I fake an all-knowing-and-understanding smile and talk about general stuff, politely inquire their health/wellbeing and before I get caught, I get the hell out of there. In such places, the words ‘aunty’ and ‘uncle’ helps loads!
However, what happens if they just call out of the blue and you happen to pick up the call up? Or they knock on your door when you are alone at home and you open the door?
In the first case, I usually just ask who they are and then if they mock at me about not knowing them, I just make up stories like poor transmission or voice not clear or instrument fault or simply say that I was sleeping before the call!
In the latter’s case, what I tend to do is give a non-committal smile and look at them with polite, yet mild surprise. Smart people who can actually tell that the poor dear standing opposite doesn’t recognize them, they introduce themselves and all will be fine.
Nevertheless, there are also some stupid people, who don’t understand the mind expressions or gestures, and wait for US to initiate. I try asking them very courteously, “Uh.. hmm..Sorry.. But who are you?” Again, people with even a little decency tell who they are, may be some identification, explain some relationship or from where they are. The others, I guess, are just too dumb take the cue. Some (idiots) pose riddles, while others (fools) demand, ”Why? Don’t you know me?”
Now wait a minute! What the F do they think? If I had known who they were, WHY THE HELL WOULD I EVEN ASK’M? Such dumb acts only lower their own dignity and self respect, I say! And to these half-wits, I just can’t help replying with fake-patience-plus-light-sarcasm, “No… No I don’t! So, again, Who are you?!?”
If they still refuse to answer the out-right question, the only possible thing that can be done, is shutting the door on their faces to show that they were definitely not recognized and their dumb-wits were certainly not entertained!!
1. Neither of them know one another, in which case they just walk away without any problems (mostly, I think..)!
2. Both of them know each other and wish/greet/acknowledge their familiarity.
3. One knows the other but the other way.
The third case, I believe, is very common these days, and frequent in my life. At such times when we get to meet or are obliged to make conversation with someone who happens to know us, and yet are strangers to us, what the hell are we supposed to say?
Usually if it’s a relative and I can roughly guess who they are looking at the people around them, I fake an all-knowing-and-understanding smile and talk about general stuff, politely inquire their health/wellbeing and before I get caught, I get the hell out of there. In such places, the words ‘aunty’ and ‘uncle’ helps loads!
However, what happens if they just call out of the blue and you happen to pick up the call up? Or they knock on your door when you are alone at home and you open the door?
In the first case, I usually just ask who they are and then if they mock at me about not knowing them, I just make up stories like poor transmission or voice not clear or instrument fault or simply say that I was sleeping before the call!
In the latter’s case, what I tend to do is give a non-committal smile and look at them with polite, yet mild surprise. Smart people who can actually tell that the poor dear standing opposite doesn’t recognize them, they introduce themselves and all will be fine.
Nevertheless, there are also some stupid people, who don’t understand the mind expressions or gestures, and wait for US to initiate. I try asking them very courteously, “Uh.. hmm..Sorry.. But who are you?” Again, people with even a little decency tell who they are, may be some identification, explain some relationship or from where they are. The others, I guess, are just too dumb take the cue. Some (idiots) pose riddles, while others (fools) demand, ”Why? Don’t you know me?”
Now wait a minute! What the F do they think? If I had known who they were, WHY THE HELL WOULD I EVEN ASK’M? Such dumb acts only lower their own dignity and self respect, I say! And to these half-wits, I just can’t help replying with fake-patience-plus-light-sarcasm, “No… No I don’t! So, again, Who are you?!?”
If they still refuse to answer the out-right question, the only possible thing that can be done, is shutting the door on their faces to show that they were definitely not recognized and their dumb-wits were certainly not entertained!!
Monday, July 27, 2009
What the hell?!?
Yesterday, I had a very infuriating conversation with my parents. It all started with some stupid Tamil serial, where the parents weep and wail over a couple who run away to get married or something equally stupid.
Dad : This dowry system was so widely prevalent even now in the rural areas, that the girl’s father actually encourages his daughter to run off with a suitable guy, get married and return after a month or so. On their return, he would pretend to be abashed by their act along with the boy’s parents, and eventually both would accept the married couple without lakhs being spent by the bride’s family in wedding customs and dowry. Apparently such cheap and effective ways were used by the couples and/or the girl’s poor parents to avoid the wrath of dowry system.
Me : Well, as at some point, someone had to stop giving dowry one way or another, coz the ones who would get money mostly might not take the initiation. Why... even educated grooms of today still don’t spend a penny or offer to share the wedding expenses from the bride’s parents! A t least most of them don’t, unless it’s a love marriage and the girl has guts enough to make her guy see the right and the wrong and make him ‘be a man’ and share.
This was all I said, no double or triple meaning intended. To these words, my dad gave me a very sarcastic smile, something I had never seen before.
Me: what? You don’t think running away, as easy as it may sound, to be the right solution to dowry problem, is it?
Dad: no.. not that. Personally, I did not take a penny from your mother, and I don’t intend giving anything in your marriage either. But running away of my daughter is something I wouldn’t even think of. The very thought is extremely ridiculous and infact, its funny!
Again, a sarcastic laugh.
Me: Sure! Because you trust me that much, right?
Dad: Not that I don’t trust you, its just that I don’t think you can!
Mom : (giving dad a stern look) He is just joking dear. Just pulling your leg.
Me: WHAT? Why not?!? I could run away iff I wanted to! Not that I do want to…
Dad: naah.. you are not the kind of a girl who could, you know, have a boyfriend. That’s all.
Me: what nonsense! I don’t have one coz I didn’t want to break your trust and coz I chose not to. What makes you think that I ‘can’t’ have one? I just have to wave a hand or give a signal. You’ll have to eat your words then.
Mom(sitting upright): really?!? Why? Is there someone?
Dad : (openly laughing by now) yeah right!
Mom : Who is this boy you are referring to? Is he your college mate? Is he a Christian? Is that why you always, and more often these days, keep praising Christian weddings and how you love them?
Me: Alright! You guys have got to stop your wild imaginations for a sec and listen. No mom, there is no one like that!
Dad : (stops laughing and turns to mom) I am telling you. She is not like that. Now her sister… I wouldn’t put it past her! But she just can’t be like that!
Me: I can’t believe you don’t trust me! You have such a low opinion of me!
Mom : Nonsense! He says so because he trusts you and has a high opinion of you.
Me: Well, after I get a good job, I’ll get a guy too, whether you like it or not. Its not that difficult, you know? I’ll prove it to you that all these years I have been single only by choice and that too, for you guys only.
Mom : So there definitely is no one right now?
Dad : So you are ok with being with a guy and getting married and that sort of life. Our girl is growing!
Mom: (smiling with comprehension) That is such a relief!
Me :(Feeling cheated) Hey!! I didn’t say that. And NO! I am not interested, let alone ready for those things! What the hell!!
With that, I stormed out of the room with my fists balled and my back turned on my ROFLing parents. Parents these days, are becoming too smart for their own good! Hmph!
Dad : This dowry system was so widely prevalent even now in the rural areas, that the girl’s father actually encourages his daughter to run off with a suitable guy, get married and return after a month or so. On their return, he would pretend to be abashed by their act along with the boy’s parents, and eventually both would accept the married couple without lakhs being spent by the bride’s family in wedding customs and dowry. Apparently such cheap and effective ways were used by the couples and/or the girl’s poor parents to avoid the wrath of dowry system.
Me : Well, as at some point, someone had to stop giving dowry one way or another, coz the ones who would get money mostly might not take the initiation. Why... even educated grooms of today still don’t spend a penny or offer to share the wedding expenses from the bride’s parents! A t least most of them don’t, unless it’s a love marriage and the girl has guts enough to make her guy see the right and the wrong and make him ‘be a man’ and share.
This was all I said, no double or triple meaning intended. To these words, my dad gave me a very sarcastic smile, something I had never seen before.
Me: what? You don’t think running away, as easy as it may sound, to be the right solution to dowry problem, is it?
Dad: no.. not that. Personally, I did not take a penny from your mother, and I don’t intend giving anything in your marriage either. But running away of my daughter is something I wouldn’t even think of. The very thought is extremely ridiculous and infact, its funny!
Again, a sarcastic laugh.
Me: Sure! Because you trust me that much, right?
Dad: Not that I don’t trust you, its just that I don’t think you can!
Mom : (giving dad a stern look) He is just joking dear. Just pulling your leg.
Me: WHAT? Why not?!? I could run away iff I wanted to! Not that I do want to…
Dad: naah.. you are not the kind of a girl who could, you know, have a boyfriend. That’s all.
Me: what nonsense! I don’t have one coz I didn’t want to break your trust and coz I chose not to. What makes you think that I ‘can’t’ have one? I just have to wave a hand or give a signal. You’ll have to eat your words then.
Mom(sitting upright): really?!? Why? Is there someone?
Dad : (openly laughing by now) yeah right!
Mom : Who is this boy you are referring to? Is he your college mate? Is he a Christian? Is that why you always, and more often these days, keep praising Christian weddings and how you love them?
Me: Alright! You guys have got to stop your wild imaginations for a sec and listen. No mom, there is no one like that!
Dad : (stops laughing and turns to mom) I am telling you. She is not like that. Now her sister… I wouldn’t put it past her! But she just can’t be like that!
Me: I can’t believe you don’t trust me! You have such a low opinion of me!
Mom : Nonsense! He says so because he trusts you and has a high opinion of you.
Me: Well, after I get a good job, I’ll get a guy too, whether you like it or not. Its not that difficult, you know? I’ll prove it to you that all these years I have been single only by choice and that too, for you guys only.
Mom : So there definitely is no one right now?
Dad : So you are ok with being with a guy and getting married and that sort of life. Our girl is growing!
Mom: (smiling with comprehension) That is such a relief!
Me :(Feeling cheated) Hey!! I didn’t say that. And NO! I am not interested, let alone ready for those things! What the hell!!
With that, I stormed out of the room with my fists balled and my back turned on my ROFLing parents. Parents these days, are becoming too smart for their own good! Hmph!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Trial and Error
Yesterday, a few of us friends met after quite some time. It was really very invigorating, to roam on the T-Nagar streets aimlessly, to gen-enthu crash into Naidu Hall for water and AC there, generally sit in there gossiping and pretending to be looking at the skirt collection, make a friend try out utterly ridiculous clothes in the trial room and take snaps, sit on the iron bench on the platform licking softie and cracking jokes about strangers and their clothes n all, remembering and quoting funny n stupid nostalgic incidents. I realized that my life had come to a total standstill, a huge mundane meaningless void.
I waited for a really long time in the terminus for my bus thinking all of this. I felt really mad at myself for having landed there, where I was, and told myself that I was the only one who could save myself from sinking further into the emptiness, and I simply HAD to spice up my life, at least a little bit for the starters. There were other buses coming in and going out, with school/college punks making a huge racket and climbing on the running buses. There it was right in front of my eyes, something I could do, or atleast try. I was as good as any guy, not too fat, not too old, and not too stiff either. So, I finally found a bus to get on, and decided to wait till the bus started and get on after that! Afterall, I was alone; no parents/sis/friends with me, who would tense/freak/snigger at my attempt. Even if I embarrassed myself, I would be only in front of total strangers who I might never see, like ever again! So… I did it! I mean, tried getting on the running bus.
First attempt: total failure. The first step of the bus seemed to be too high for my legs to reach and the hold was slipping. People had spotted what I was trying. Some loki perverts were cheering, while some adults were keeping a what-the-hell-is-she-thinking face.
But then, I heard my own voice in my head. “ What the hell female?!? How difficult is this? If you are going to fail at this, then you clearly deserve to be in the boring mundane void space for the rest of your life and definitely deserve to be in called ‘anty’ by tat one-year-old-neighbor-kid.” That was it.
Second attempt: SUCCESS!! Ruling out the wild appreciating cheers by some and highly disapproving frowns by others and the throbbing pain in my arms and nicely hit legs & toes, I completely succeed in getting into tat running bus!! :D Now this was something I had never dared to risk or never been allowed to do by the accompanying person. There! My life was not as mundane as I thought afterall!!
I came home, smiling widely, much to the pleasure of my parents. But I become conscious of the blunder and the painful after-effects of my ‘enthued experimentation’ only today, and got appalling feedbacks from various parts of my body. Every time I walk, my damned head now groans and says, “Awww…. That damned bus!! You knew I was blabbering, having stayed in the scorching sun for a really long time! Why-o-why did you have to listen to me?”
So I have decided 3 things:
1. I might be as good as a guy in most of the stuff, but getting on running busses is definitely NOT one of them.
2. My brain doesn’t die like in stroke when exposed to scorching sun for a really long time; it just tries TO KILL ME!!!
3. No matter how many gimmicks I do, that kiddo next door is going to call me anty nevertheless!! So might as well accept it and never let it come near!! :P
I waited for a really long time in the terminus for my bus thinking all of this. I felt really mad at myself for having landed there, where I was, and told myself that I was the only one who could save myself from sinking further into the emptiness, and I simply HAD to spice up my life, at least a little bit for the starters. There were other buses coming in and going out, with school/college punks making a huge racket and climbing on the running buses. There it was right in front of my eyes, something I could do, or atleast try. I was as good as any guy, not too fat, not too old, and not too stiff either. So, I finally found a bus to get on, and decided to wait till the bus started and get on after that! Afterall, I was alone; no parents/sis/friends with me, who would tense/freak/snigger at my attempt. Even if I embarrassed myself, I would be only in front of total strangers who I might never see, like ever again! So… I did it! I mean, tried getting on the running bus.
First attempt: total failure. The first step of the bus seemed to be too high for my legs to reach and the hold was slipping. People had spotted what I was trying. Some loki perverts were cheering, while some adults were keeping a what-the-hell-is-she-thinking face.
But then, I heard my own voice in my head. “ What the hell female?!? How difficult is this? If you are going to fail at this, then you clearly deserve to be in the boring mundane void space for the rest of your life and definitely deserve to be in called ‘anty’ by tat one-year-old-neighbor-kid.” That was it.
Second attempt: SUCCESS!! Ruling out the wild appreciating cheers by some and highly disapproving frowns by others and the throbbing pain in my arms and nicely hit legs & toes, I completely succeed in getting into tat running bus!! :D Now this was something I had never dared to risk or never been allowed to do by the accompanying person. There! My life was not as mundane as I thought afterall!!
I came home, smiling widely, much to the pleasure of my parents. But I become conscious of the blunder and the painful after-effects of my ‘enthued experimentation’ only today, and got appalling feedbacks from various parts of my body. Every time I walk, my damned head now groans and says, “Awww…. That damned bus!! You knew I was blabbering, having stayed in the scorching sun for a really long time! Why-o-why did you have to listen to me?”
So I have decided 3 things:
1. I might be as good as a guy in most of the stuff, but getting on running busses is definitely NOT one of them.
2. My brain doesn’t die like in stroke when exposed to scorching sun for a really long time; it just tries TO KILL ME!!!
3. No matter how many gimmicks I do, that kiddo next door is going to call me anty nevertheless!! So might as well accept it and never let it come near!! :P
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