Do dupattas deserve all the hype?

Dupattas are definitely the most annoying wasteful pieces of clothes. They embarrass girls more than they help/protect/what-ever-they-are-supposed-to-do. Some say that they are meant to enhance the style and highlight the grace of a woman, just to be hung around one’s neck; Some say that its a huge kerchief, that can be used to wipe/dust/swab anything anywhere; Some say its often useful at extreme climates- for covering the head n face by making a mask when out in sun, or wearing like a shawl to protect from chill breeze, or covering your head to protect it from soaking in rain.

I acknowledge all of these. But there is its other maddening side too! It falls off at all the wrong places at all the wrong times (damn the Murphy’s Law!). Most of the times while walking in wind, it flies off, attracting unwanted attention that a girl would be asked to avoid in public. In the winds, if its ends even brush by mistake on some passerby, he would either give a disgusted can’t-you-manage-it look or an appreciative perverted look. A friend of mine was so humiliated when her dupatta just flew off due to strong winds; from her shoulders to the middle of the opposite road. What was she supposed to do? Run after it? How stupid would that have looked? It was even more awkward when the amused onlookers on her side were looking at her for a nice entertaining reaction! Once some guys confronted to us girls that they thought girls kept adjusting their dupattas for fun, as a habit or a mannerism, or perhaps even to attract the attention of guys! How utterly ridiculous! It was even crazier when they actually imitated the dupatta-handling styles of some of our lady-profs and friends!

Oh well… whatever it is, we could even conduct debates on ‘dupattas- boon or bane’ or ‘dupatta- a necessary evil’… it could be a really funny topic to ponder!

Nice Girls

The description of nice girls has been given by veda with so much vividity that this daring portrayal deserves a wide round of applause and compliments from all the nice girls in the world. The scenario in real-life, esp. of a nice girl is very much as has been depicted. But I personally did not feel depressed in any way at all as some people have felt. It voiced out most of what ever I might have thought and discussed very often with my close friends and my cousins very recently.

I still very staunchly believe that most men- nice/not-nice would never look at a subtle mannered soft spoken shy girl even if they know that they are the ones they would want to end up with. They just can’t help wanting to try out a number of those ‘modern women’; the ones who would be well approved by their circle of friends and the men-world, who could easily arouse the jealousy of every other guy who would see them together, who would not have any problem in a public show of affection, basically a girl who would addict them… who would make their nerves flood with hormones… who would refuse nor refute their acts of insanity or stupidity. So even if they realize their mistake sooner or later, they would only correct it by breaking up with the 'wrong girl' (unless they gets dumped before). After that, finding a nice homely sensible sort of a girl for a life-partner is mommy’s job- not his! The one who would put kolams early in the morning, the one who would leave her family, her job, her career for him to serve his parents, his grand parents and his sisters and their families too without a tiny hesitation or grumble… yuck! The whole concept!!

Why do nice people always seem to end up sacrificing the most? This is most definitely unfair. Hope the nice girls end up with these nice guys without any parents’ intervention or any stupid horoscope shit… and then all would be fair and life would be filled with flowers n colors.

God helps… But how???

There is this very common saying- God helps those who help themselves (1). But I can’t help wonder a few hitches in this.

Well, in the famous dice-game follow-up in Mahabharata, where Draupadi is stripped off her clothes in public, seeing her husbands unable or unwilling to help her, the first thing that she does is try and resist herself. When absolutely powerless, D stops resisting and prays to Lord Krishna to protect her, which, he does. But I wasn't able to follow one point in this. D was first 'helping herself', in vain. Why didn’t K help her knowing that she was in trouble at that time? Why was he waiting for a prayer even though she was his great friend, almost a sister? Doesn’t this contradict (1)? Does the above incident mean that God helps only those who ask and pray for help (2)?

Another popular philosophical saying is 'Everything happens for the Good. (3)' but we find a lot of things in our daily life, that doesn’t really seem so to our 'naked' eyes. There are loads of bitter feelings and complaints in everybody's lives. So much so that one could ask-“For whose good?!?”

I have seen my mother pray everyday, pray with all her heart, pray with unwavered devotion. I somehow find it a little funny, when she usually says, "In case of any distress or pain, approach God. For anything that you think you deserve or wish dearly, approach God. Anything happy or anything sad, approach God! He always helps..." but I have never seen her blame him if she doesn’t get anything of what she asks God for; or even if the exact opposite of whatever she prays for happens. Then she says, “It was to have happened that way. Every thing that happens in our life is the fruit of our own paap n punya. (4)" Then I ask,” But what was the point of all our prayers?!? If it was to have happened that way all along, then why even ask God knowing that he is not going to go out of his way to help?!?" Now the (2) is contradicted too, and so is (3). Bcoz, if they are all based on paap/punya account, then all the things that happen to us obviously aren’t 'for the good'!

But again, this doesn't seem entirely right. During my PS-I in sankara nethralaya, I saw many patients with various eye-disouders. Amongst them was a 30-day infant, who was apparently born with congenital cataract in both its eyes. Now - in its short lifespan of about 10 months in its mother's womb, what possible paap could that child have done to deserve this? My grandmother says now "Most of the things in our lives depend not only on our own paap/punya (this life or our previous lives) but also on out ancestors'(5). " She also told me a number of real-life stories as proof for this. Now there you go!! This has contradicted (4) in many ways! We can’t expect things that we deserve for our own hard work or punya or even blame ourselves for our own fate!! Wow!!

Now I am totally confused (as usual :))!! Should I just give up a much-required task after a hard try and just pray to God for help? Am I even supposed to ask God for what I want and what I don’t want, for what I need badly and what I desire dearly?? Is it right to work hard towards some goal, and incase of a failure, blame the 'fate' or 'previous lives' or 'ancestors' or the God himself for having been deaf to my prayers???

Well... as I told you, I really don’t know. I am neither an Atheist nor critical about anything related to religions or its beliefs. I am just confused with no straight convincing answers. But I still pray God; not for anything in particular these days (not that I don’t need anything- coz I could write a 100-page wish-list even right now!). I just say those slokas I know, and pray though I feel that life is already sketched out and my prayers aren't going to change anything of my pre-planned life, or fetch me anything of what I need/want/deserve unless it was already meant to be there.But Yes, I still pray.

CHLEEPING BEAUTY

I sleep when I am sad
I sleep when I am angry
I sleep when I am full
I sleep when I am hungry

I sleep when its hot
I sleep when its cold
I sleep when its gloomy
I sleep when its rainy
I sleep when its day
I sleep when its night

I sleep when I am tired
I sleep when I am bored
I sleep when I am contented
I sleep when I am scared

I doze off in class
I snooze off in office
I sleep when I am sick
I sleep with a book!
I sleep when I am relaxed
I sleep when I am home... :)

Happy times lovely fantasies
Sad times far-fetched dreams
Scared nights horrible nightmares
Contented days dreamless sleep

Bored days disturbed naps
Sick days painful ones
Tired days endless sleep
At home, dreamy sleep
But the best sleeps- the entire day before unprepared exams!! :D

This is definitely not a poem... It’s just a babble from a chleepy me...

"I NEED A NEW WARDROBE!!!"

Accompanied with a lot of drastic changes in my life, there is one major tragedy which I’ll have to resolve asap... I HAVE NO NICE CLOTHES- 'FORMALS' OR 'CASUALS' THAT ARE APPROPRIATE TO BE WORN IN BANGALORE!!! Girls here seem to wear only branded T-Shirts or sober formal shirts and pants. Dresses were not a huge issue back in the campus, where we always had that 'kuch bhi chalega' attitude. Having practically lived in BITS T-Shirts and cute maheshwari kurtis, i do not find most of them good enough to wear here in this atmosphere where you get all wierd looks and you get judged very easily based on what you wear!! Everyday morning now, it has become a routine for me to look at my dresses and scream out-"I NEED A NEW WARDROBE!!!"

Old habits are hard to die...

I just can’t stop myself from comparing every thing n everyone n every tiny incident in my daily life here with my BITSian life. The BITSian hangover doesn’t seem to wear out! Even though it infuriates a lot of people around me, I still have to do things and speak out, the ‘BITSian way’!! A part of me just wants to get over and just move on with this corporate-life. But there again, another part of me just simply refuses to let it go!! I just can’t stop myself from quoting an incident or stating a memory or laughing at old jokes or using awkward BITSian slangs or carefree words that wouldn’t have been an issue at all in My World… I know people around me are patient even if it irritates or embarrasses them at times, but I really hope to get a better control over my BITSian styles and learn soon to think/speak/behave normally, the non-BITSian way…

Ex-BITSian??

There was a time during my BITSian life esp during my CDC years, when I have wished to just run away from that place, with a series of tests, tuts, labs, assignments, presentations n reports… but now after leaving the campus (though not a ‘pass out’ yet, thankfully) suddenly, ‘My World’ seems to have just puffed off like a mere dream! As I remember, I didn’t cry or even look back when I left My Hostel, My Campus, My Universe, (esp after a series of compres), knowing that I won’t be coming back for studies, and hoping that I won’t have to come back just for placements. But now, I wish I had just taken a few moments to stand at each place to feel a little nostalgic n all, like the other psenti-semites. But NO! I was just too ‘busy’ for all the senti-stuff!! Now that I turn back and see, I hardly remember anything of the acads/what they taught/what I learnt!! All that I have in my heart are those stolen moments in FD3 and IC terrace, those mid-night walks on nights with perms, those crappy games played in EDC sessions, those cute jackings in Bio-Assoc, the peaceful walks through staff-quarters and Shiv-ji, SKY patties, Bluemoon MNB, Nagarji’s sam-chat/chai, IP msngr chats, DC++ browsing and most of all, the night-time lacha sessions and wonderful trips with my wingies. I am glad that I was a part of what I was and I really pray to God that I get a gr8 set of new friends here as well, who might never replace what I had left behind; but would help me build another whole new happy world out here.